My Awakening to Jesus

I am blessed. Radically and wonderfully blessed. I live in a country where I have the freedom of worshiping God at any time, any place, and without fear of retribution. I live in a nice house, in a nice town, and I've been blessed with 2 gorgeous kids, ages 12 and 29 Now, that's a miracle! At times, I am overwhelmed by the sheer beauty that surrounds me. I love to walk at night and gaze up at the stars- or rise before dawn and walk through the mist of morning and talk to my heavenly father.

It hasn't always been this way. Having been reared in an abusive family, my father thought my body was his personal punching bag. I've been hospitalized with multiple traumas, including ones to my back and hips, 2 incidents of a cracked skull, and numerous other less life-threatening injuries. My mom was an enabler with a capital E who spent most of her life hiding from my Dad. What compounded this was that Mom had become ensnared into an equally abusive cult and dragged us all in- kicking and screaming all the way. This served to distort my view of God, question his "goodness," and leave me hopeless for a future where the world was predicted to end by 1975. I did not escape their influence until much later in life.

But then something miraculous happened. Through "prayer and supplication," I begged to be given clarity and wisdom. I prayed that God would remove the veil of confusion that this group had managed to wrap around my life, and and shine a light through the darkness. It was at this time that I became aware of the Christian television network, along with Christian radio. I surrounded myself with their encouraging messages. I watched Joyce Meyers, Creflo Dollar, Charles Stanley and Joel Osteen, nonstop.

Although some of their beliefs differed, their message was uniform: God Loves me: Christ died for me- and for you. Salvation was not to be found in the stinging whip of the cult leaders tongue, nor in the exhaustive list of rules and regulations the "society" concocted to dominate its members, but in the soothing words of the Great Shepherd and the gentle hand of the Father.

Now, as I travel through life, I find it difficult not to share my faith. I awaken to His Word each day, and fall to sleep the same. Jesus has become my constant companion, the Redeemer of my faith. Last year I made my dedication legal and became ordained, dedicating myself to the ministry. This year I have pledged myself to reaching out to others who have been warped and abused by the "False Prophet," or who have otherwise lost their way. I hope to provide a safe haven, a soothing place where they can gain knowledge of the real Jesus- the forgiving gentle Savior of our souls.